sabato 24 ottobre 2009

Submission

Thrash me, I take it. Slap me across the face, I turn for more. Command me, I bow down. Knock me to my knees, whip me into submission. Tie me down, I am cowed but come back for more. Break me. My spirit bows to you.

Thrashed by “what the fuck’s the matter with you?” I bow my head. Your terse retorts sting like so many slaps across the face, your silences like commands to bow down. Your cocked eyebrow knocks me to my knees, your cold glare whips me into submission. Rebuffed, my hands are tied, I wait patiently for your next command. Broken, you hold me tight.

You have never laid a hand on me. I am addicted to pain. It is the only way I have ever known love. I, am an emotional masochist.

martedì 20 ottobre 2009

Sex and the Older Girl

Thank you all for contributing to this discussion and once again, your thoughtful comments merit being posted front and center.

Donna: What particularly intrigues me is how a "purely" physically-induced experience is linked to past times when there was a social/emotional reason for the wave of heat. Our minds really do work that way.

...so far I haven't yet experienced such things, but they will happen, I know. I feel as if I've just figured myself out and now the rules are all going to change, lol. Isn't life interesting that way?

Isabel: My question is this: Is it a purely physically-induced experience and/or is it exacerbated by our response/reaction to it, because, I face it, some of this aging process is terrifying, but if we take a deep breath and let it flow can we get through it with at the least grace and dignity?

I'm going to push the limit here and give you the flip side of this uncomfortable experience in another poem.

At 53


A soft warmth
Washes
Over my face

My breasts revert
to supple
pre-motherhood crescents

Hyper sensitive to the touch
Nipples and cunt yearn
Desire mounts

And now
Only warm semen seeps
Where once
My warm blood flowed

Jeremy: Amazing image!

Emerald: I just commented on Donna's blog about the intelligence of the body, and I agree much with you both that our response to/interpretation of physical/body-related aspects have relevance and that experiences of the physical body are opportunities to be in touch with ourselves on many levels.

Isabel: I feel very strongly, literally and figuratively, that the physical and psycho/emotional are intricately interwoven. We need to heed both our physical and emotional signals. One follows the other and it is never clear which is which.

Emerald: Definitely

Donna: Emerald said it for me already, but of course making meaning is what the human brain craves, isn't it? And I'm sure our cultural context as well as our personal history in making meaning influences the experience. As you pointed out, if menopause is seen as liberation and a chance to explore sexuality as recreation rather than reproduction, then it will be greeted differently than if it's seen as the end of desirability, with the assumption that our husbands will now dump us for a younger woman (although that brain book said 65% of divorces after 50 are initiated by the woman!) Change is always a challenge and not that we should aim to go through it without conflict or struggle, but I like the idea of doing it differently, borrowing from other cultures, challenging the status quo. I guess I've always liked that, lol.

Gina Marie: The older I get, the more I want to taste, and the more I taste, the more I want to live, the faster I want to go. Life just gets richer and richer -- and more poetic every day. And tastier, too.

Jeremy, thank you so much for the validation of this image, it is a truly beautiful experience amid all the other rather scary ones.

Emerald, absolutely, I think we need to remain very conscious of what our bodies are telling us and vice versa.

Dear Donna, I love the statistic that 65% of divorces after 50 are initiated by the woman! I’d say it was worth the read just for that. ; ) borrowing from other cultures hm, it would be very interesting to hear the Japanese take on this. Change is extremely difficult and challenging the status quo and thinking for ourselves is a the way to go. Confronting societal norms is really a challenge, one is on one’s own at that point and must remain strong in one’s convictions because you’re pretty alone with them. If I had a role model it might be Charlotte Rampling.

Gina Marie! I am so with you on all that! It’s almost like a distilling process, the more you live the stronger the sensations on all levels. Thank you so much.

The aging process seems to start from the top down (as I write in yet another age related poem, I’m ok from about the collar bone down so far, and my toes show hardly any signs of age at all ; ) ) and the outside in, I think it is a matter of getting used to what you see in the mirror and accepting it, while still enjoying the sensations in all their increasing intensity. Like “At 53” there are so many advantages in the process.

Again, thank you all so much for contributing.

sabato 17 ottobre 2009

Alison, Alison, Alison

How do I love you, let me count the ways...

out of 486 phone sex references on your lap-top you call up one of mine!


Phone sex is so, well, sexy, especially if you're speaking with someone with a voice that turns you on at the first note, maybe it's very deep, maybe he has an accent, maybe she has a wicked laugh... maybe you just imagine her voice in your ear... and close your eyes...

giovedì 15 ottobre 2009

The Female Brain

Once again Donna George Storey has opened a great topic and others have made fascinating contributions to the discussion! Here's part of my side of the Storey.

At 55

Shock and horror
registers
my heart sinks
my breath taken
like being hit in the chest
the heat of
every embarrassment
humiliation
shame
indignation
fear
anger
relived
when a warm wave washes
over my face
and shoulders and
ribs
I take a deep breath
and wait it out
knowing
this too shall pass